A few months back BBC Four did a season on British women in pop, calling it something snappy like ‘Humans with vaginas that can sing and play instruments’. To be honest, we missed most of it, mainly because we were worried Geri Halliwell might be in one of the documentaries from the past decade or something. Life can turn very dark when Geri Halliwell’s around.
Anyway, what we did see was pretty spectacular and revolved solely around the incredible Kate Bush. They showed, in its entirety, a Christmas special she hosted for the BBC back in 1979. Now, we’ve all been pretty pissed at Christmas, but imagine settling down with your family and a few sherrys to watch TV when this appears onscreen:
Granny would be asking who’d slipped her the LSD.
This clip of ‘Ran Tan Waltz’ features Kate Bush wearing a fake beard, a male dancer in a nappy and the lyrics, “She’ll run back in fright / If she picks on a dick / That’s too big for her pride.”
Seriously, why don’t pop stars get their own Christmas specials anymore? Oh yeah, because they’re all so bloody dull in comparison. Who else could get away with leaping around like a crazed goth or a dustbin-dwelling rock chick? I think we’d all rather see this then another GrahamJohnNortonBarrowman talent contest on ice.